Giving Grace

10 Years ago I experienced a trauma that impacted so many in my life and those that love me. I will say that this trauma has also brought so much grace, and positives although felt like one of the hardest times in my life.

In this life we all go through events that cause us to reflect, decide, and/or determine a new direction or take a new step. I believe this life is much like a metamorphosis. We are all brought to this world without impressions or biases and as life progresses through many of the societal norms we shift and change our perspective. I truly believe that we are here to “unlearn” all of these items and to become whole again, much like a newborn who is seeing everything for the first time without judgement and rather with curiosity. I am on this journey now and have realized all of the traumatic experiences in this life are aiding in the development to become whole again. I am so thankful for the events because they too have made me realize how others may feel as they go through similar events.

While each event is unique to the individual and we can relate to one another, we do not completely know what the individual is experiencing. We do not understand until we complete “walk in their shoes”. However, this is where the human condition is so extraordinary, when we can relate, we can show grace and love for one another. I believe this is truly a primary purpose as to why we are here. Once we can relate, we can be there as a guide or listener. By seeking to understand and showing grace, we all reveal hope. Through the hope, love and grace outshine any difficulty.

Have you ever took a step back and asked yourself why are we all here?

Goodness, grace, and love always reigns when we can come together to share, to compare, to help, to support. It may be something that may seem insignificant to you, but to the person on the opposite side of the table it could be their LIGHT.

I am thankful for the difficulties, as they have helped to make me realize that every breath in this life is a gift. Really taking in each moment and being curious as to what we are learning from the moment are the greatest gifts we are given. This can be in our hardest times as well. I thank and honor this grand universe for the learning opportunities that have helped me soften my heart and open my eyes to the reality of what is.

As I look back to 10 years ago dancing with my sons, and trying to make light of my experience, it brings a few tears. But I give myself grace knowing that my children saw their mother and her resilience in the experience. https://youtu.be/-4j7lE5d0BI

These other two videos were crucial moments as well, and I was in complete fear as what was to come. On the day the halo came off, I found out my hangman’s fracture did not heal, in fact it was worse off than before. https://youtu.be/o23NLhgjZ0g and https://youtu.be/H_5lk01G8y0 . I had so many question of what was to come. What did this mean for me as a mother, daughter, wife that my C1 was still broken, shattered, it didn’t heal? The months that followed I questioned so much, and did not relay my fear to my boys. All throughout the experience I wanted them to see strength, resilience, and that when things happen in our lives we have the power to get through. Today many would not even know I still have a broken neck (C1 stabilized by scar tissue and cartilage) . But I chose faith, and to focus on what I could do vs what I could not do.

There are so many emotions that rush back as I live this again. I am so very thankful for my family through this time, for my husband, mom and dad, my in laws, my brother/sister in law and friends that are like family. The support I was given was what carried me through. The love I had for the ones that surrounded me was my inspiration to know that life does get better. One step at a time…. That is what it takes to move forward and a large cup of grace for ones self.

Today in this COVID world there is a lot going on around all of us, but the items that always stay true is the love that surrounds us from those we call family. This world is full of beauty. There is beauty that exists is in every moment if you chose to find it. I truly believe we are all broken in some way, but the beautiful aspects exist all around us and inside us. The power comes from when we decide to choose that regardless of what is happening, to find the beautiful. It starts by looking in the mirror at yourself.

I did then what I knew to do. Now I know better, I do better. – Maya Angelou

Love Ness

The Power of Choice

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Perspective…. It can be everything to us can’t it be?   Past experiences often influence our response and trigger feelings within.     The only thing we have control of in this life is how we choose to respond to the moments.    Sometimes we may not feel like we have control, but that is not the case, there is always a choice.

I have had moments in my life that have taken my breath away, moments that have torn me inside out from the core, and moments that leave me numb.   We all have those moments.

It is in those moments where the something powerful emerges – the POWER TO CHOOSE.      As I look back in my life, the moments I have experienced, that have been allowed to happen in my life, have always turned out for good.

But it doesn’t always end up that way for us all because there are usually two paths.

One path is driven by fear, we are a victim, a slave to the moment.

Another path although bumpy offers the least resistance.  This path can offer learning, good to come out of the bad, and is embraced by moving forward one step at a time.

I am thankful for all of the choices I have been given, and the roads I have traveled.  While there has been difficulty along the way, there was always a light to help me navigate.

This journey of life involves difficulty, happiness, anger, hope, sadness, joy, death, life.   As we go through the valleys and up the hills, we have the power to choose and embrace what is.  As we take one step at a time there will always be a light to shine our way.     I believe this to my innermost core.

Today as I sit in this moment, I thank God so much for teaching me how to get up after I fall, how to let go of the fear and trust, how to move forward and to learn to love and trust myself inside out.    This is all a journey, a process, something that I struggle with – loving myself.  But bit by bit I am realizing how I love others is the same grace I need to show myself.

Thank-you Father for your grace you always show me in my day.   YOU are so powerful, and your love is never ending.

Luv Ness