Tag Archive | love of self

The Power of Choice

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Perspective…. It can be everything to us can’t it be?   Past experiences often influence our response and trigger feelings within.     The only thing we have control of in this life is how we choose to respond to the moments.    Sometimes we may not feel like we have control, but that is not the case, there is always a choice.

I have had moments in my life that have taken my breath away, moments that have torn me inside out from the core, and moments that leave me numb.   We all have those moments.

It is in those moments where the something powerful emerges – the POWER TO CHOOSE.      As I look back in my life, the moments I have experienced, that have been allowed to happen in my life, have always turned out for good.

But it doesn’t always end up that way for us all because there are usually two paths.

One path is driven by fear, we are a victim, a slave to the moment.

Another path although bumpy offers the least resistance.  This path can offer learning, good to come out of the bad, and is embraced by moving forward one step at a time.

I am thankful for all of the choices I have been given, and the roads I have traveled.  While there has been difficulty along the way, there was always a light to help me navigate.

This journey of life involves difficulty, happiness, anger, hope, sadness, joy, death, life.   As we go through the valleys and up the hills, we have the power to choose and embrace what is.  As we take one step at a time there will always be a light to shine our way.     I believe this to my innermost core.

Today as I sit in this moment, I thank God so much for teaching me how to get up after I fall, how to let go of the fear and trust, how to move forward and to learn to love and trust myself inside out.    This is all a journey, a process, something that I struggle with – loving myself.  But bit by bit I am realizing how I love others is the same grace I need to show myself.

Thank-you Father for your grace you always show me in my day.   YOU are so powerful, and your love is never ending.

Luv Ness

 

Love Makes the World Go Around

image (11)Tonight as I sit and gaze at the moon light, I realize although I do not know it all, I do know one thing– Love makes the world go around.

Love so powerful, so magical, and at the same time brings such peace to this life.

In “Man’s search for Meaning” by Victor Frankel, he says “Love is the only way to grasp another human being in the innermost core of his personality. No one can become fully aware of the very essence of another human being unless he loves him. By his love he is enabled to see the essential traits and features in the beloved person; and even more, he sees that which is potential in him, which is not yet actualized but yet ought to be actualized. Furthermore, by his love, the loving person enables the beloved person to actualize these potentialities. By making him aware of what he can be and of what he should become, he makes these potentialities come true.” 

Love for others…is so powerful.

In order to love fully I believe we must love ourselves first.   It is through loving ourselves we are able to see beauty in others.    It took me most of my life to love myself.   Maybe some would be surprised that I just started really loving myself these past few years.      It feels good to be finally comfortable in my own skin.  For some they never experience this.

Too often we lose ourselves in life, or material things.    The external validation to feel good…    These things are temporary, and do not last.  Real Love lasts forever.

Yes there are bad things that happen in our lives, but if we choose to focus on the love we share, it will pull us through.   The love that we can extend to each other when someone is in need can make such a difference. 

Selfless acts of kindness.  These acts have ripple effects. Every action has a reaction.   The more we show one another love, the better life can be.

I sound a bit idealistic don’t I?  

But I want to tell you today, that this is real.

Sending a note to a friend saying “I care”, asking someone “How are you doing” and really listening, giving of ourselves for someone else, saying “sorry” when it may not  be your fault, turning the cheek and not engaging in conflict, leading by example, and showing love – ALL MAKES THE DIFFERENCE.

It is when we do these things we truly see the heart of one another.

Someone once told me that I would have to learn how to not personalize relationships in order to climb through this life.  

But I thought really?  Is this what we have become to climb?  But who are we then stepping on?

Having superficial conversations, not really caring how the other feels?  That is the way to climb life?

I struggled a bit with this, but I realized that acting this way would be against my grain.   I truly love others, I want to get to know them, understand what drives them and see them for who they are, right where they are.  

Have I been burnt? Hell ya! 

But the question is, how many times have I had kindness come back to me? A million times over!!

 What you send out there comes right back.

I choose no walls.

I choose to hug, laugh, and smile.

I choose to love life and people with my heart.

I choose to see others and myself through God’s eyes.

 

So today I challenge you, where can you show love to others?    Start now, and do it every day because it sure makes life pretty darn special.

 

 

How do you choose to focus your lens?

I choose to focus on

Do you ever focus on the things that are not working in your life?

Sometimes I focus on something negative someone said to me, and the comment grows into a
mountain.   There are instances where I also focus on something someone said to me in my past, someone who made fun of me in elementary school, on friends that hurt me in highschool, or moments that
I thought defined me as a person that I chalked up as “not so great”.  The wounds are deep…..  Or else, I am in the present and tell myself, you are not good enough, you can not measure up.    Then my mind jumps into the future and fear, anxiety, and “what ifs” fill my mind.

Yes this is so true, most of us struggle with the voices inside our heads.    The voices that tell us that we are not enough, or that we need to be more.    The mind is such a powerful thing, it can lead us down a path of destructive self-talk.   Truly loving ourselves is sometimes so difficult.

We look in the mirror and see features we would like to change, and our thoughts stop us from experiencing complete contentment.  

What if you could choose to focus on the good?   What if you saw good in all of the moments where it felt uncomfortable, what if you saw good in every moment?  

Imagine this for a moment…

I choose to only see the good in the moments that take my breath away (illness, disappointment or trouble that heads our way),

I choose to only see good in my boss or coworkers, we are all here for a reason,

I choose to only see good in the driver in front of me, he/she might be having a bad day,

I choose to only see good in my spirited family, we compliment each others weaknesses,

I choose to only see good my friends or relationships, can be bumpy but the bumps teach us the greatest lessons,

I choose to only see good in my children that have a love/hate relationship, they are healthy and happy,

I choose to only see good in my spouse who snores too much and likes to be “right”,

And I choose to only see good in me because I AM BEAUTIFUL and have been beautifully made.

Sounds simple doesn’t it?   Could it be that simple????

The one thing we have been given in this life is the power of choice.   

We may not have control on what happens in this life, but the one thing we can control is how we respond.

You can choose to focus within, shift your perspective and see yourself and everything around you through rose colored glasses…. 

You may be thinking, I am a realist… But how does it feel focusing on the bad? 

Let it go, choose to love YOU! Put that STOP SIGN in your head as soon as the bad thoughts creep in.

Start by asking yourself today, what makes me beautiful and unique?   And as you begin to do this, choose to refocus your lens everywhere you go, every moment and everyone you touch.

Only you have the power to do so.

“Therefore we do not lose heart. Though outwardly we are wasting away, yet inwardly we are being renewed day by day. For our light and momentary troubles are achieving for us an eternal glory that far outweighs them all. So we fix our eyes not on what is seen, but on what is unseen, since what is seen is temporary, but what is unseen is eternal.” (2 Corinthians 4:16-18)

 Dear Lord God,

Help us refocus on the good.  Help us to see what you have created, the moments that teach us what you want us to see.  Help us to see ourselves, the moments, and the people through your eyes.   I pray for this in Jesus Name Amen.

May you be blessed,

Ness

 

 

 

Are you Ready to Renew?

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Renew spirit, soul and self will be the theme for 2014 blog posts.

As I begin this year, it feels like a fresh new beginning.    These past three years have been some of the lowest lows, but then in the valley’s I have begun to discover elements of this life that I did not see before.    My head was in the clouds refusing to see the beauty, the gifts that have been given to me so graciously.   My mind was spinning in circles, and I was racing, to that next event or the moment that “will be perfect”.

Perfection….. Why is it that so many want to attain it?   To be, or not to be…. I have finally realized that I am ok with the “not to be”.  Not to be the perfect in how society defines it.   I chose to nurture my self and love me.   This is what He has wanted for me for so long.     Yet so many times, when I glanced in the mirror, I saw imperfection and choices that defined me.   Falling short in so many areas – on a standard that was unreachable.  A standard, lies that were spun in the many webs that are woven in this life.

I breathe deep, and feel the weights and walls finally beginning to fall.  Feeling light again.   The storm ranging inside, driven by fear and expectations has stopped.   The rainbow shines after the rain.    Renewal of the mind requires each one of us to change inside.   This is something each one of us can control, and requires work.    We cannot do this alone.

So here’s what I want you to do, God helping you: Take your everyday, ordinary life—your sleeping, eating, going-to-work, and walking-around life—and place it before God as an offering. Embracing what God does for you is the best thing you can do for him. Don’t become so well-adjusted to your culture that you fit into it without even thinking. Instead, fix your attention on God. You’ll be changed from the inside out. Readily recognize what he wants from you, and quickly respond to it. Unlike the culture around you, always dragging you down to its level of immaturity, God brings the best out of you, develops well-formed maturity in you. Romans 12:1 (The Message)

Renewal does not happen overnight.  For me, it has begun with forgiveness and filling the empty spaces with love.   The old ways are sometimes hard to change, but the new way can be so much better.   This is something we can control, we can adjust the lens in which we see this wonderful life.

Over the next year my blog will be devoted to the renewal process.   If you have a story to share, I would be happy to share with others.   The only theme is renewal and change.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=moSFlvxnbgk

 

May you be blessed,

Ness